You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
My breasts were aching with rage.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
COCAINE IS GR8
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
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