your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Randomize
