i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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