I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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