I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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