dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
