The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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