my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Congratulations! We have a period
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