I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Watching her eat just hurts me
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
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