I just cut my nipple shaving
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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