NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
