May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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