somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
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