p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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