So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
