I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
