Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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