Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
23 People Confess The Lamest Things They’ve Ever Done To Fit In
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
These 27 Texts Prove Pets Make Better BFFs Than Humans
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.