hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
if one more of _____'s family tells me "you're next" i'm going to shoot myself. Thank god for gin (most protestant phrase ever at the most Jewish wedding ever)
Ask for a julep and start talking about how you much prefer the uncircumsized peen. that should probably stop them.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize