I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
