i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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