that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
