What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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