I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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