I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
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