Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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