she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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