dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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