So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize