I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
