He is such a slut. More and more my type.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
