i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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