One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
