I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I'm bleeding and have questions
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
