i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize