So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
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