Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
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when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
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Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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