she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
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Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
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There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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