I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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