i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
you would pick up someone in the library
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
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if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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