the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize
