So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Randomize
