Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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