Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
