i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
please come you make the beer taste better
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Randomize
