i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Just invented taco cereal.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize