We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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