Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
