you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize