we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
